The Dream walker

     I have walking through time for the last eight years and found many thing that give me a lesson for being a human being. before the time I'm stopped my ways as a static generator with the old mind and thinking, that time I'm decide to falling sleep in a place called "Mirror of my back ward". but then I have a chance to traveling around the world searching "a new me" in other path of dimension within my mind and by a mirror in front of me.
    My journey was started at the night who have full moonlight, i couldn't see any cloud or night bird singing that night. I was lying down above the savana which I could see stars blinking torching my eyes, the wind is take me to some dream of my childhood where I didn't recognize my self as an ordinary child, I'm searching  for a tender of my parent which i didn't know where they are. It was a bad dream I got that night, and I am awaken and it's feel like I'm never be able to sleep again because of afraid to dream.
     At one moment that time, when I opened my eyes I seen nothing except white surround me, I didn't see any border or even a little black or other color spot around me. I thought that I'm already dead and entering a new place called heaven or maybe hell, I was trying to slap my face for remembering am I in a conscious or sub conscious mind. but I can feel pain that time so I know I haven't dead, I tried to close my eyes again hoping that everything will change after I opened my eyes.
One time I did that but it still the same...
The second time I opened my eyes also the same but the different is my vision a little blur for any minutes and for the third time I seen another place which full of green area, and I remembered that time is already noon and I look surround me and trying to remembering where I am.
I didn't know whats happen to me... then I walked to find out what I faced for and what is really going on.
     I stepped carefully because there's a lot of roses with sharp thorns near by me. I look around and walked for a long time at least that's what I felt that time, my body is getting tired and hungry. I walked straight without turning even see my back.

     In a distance I saw a river, a very huge river. I'm tried to make sure my vision until my mind said "yes, that's true you been seen a river in front", then I ran faster as I could to get a drink and for ten minutes I ran finally I arrived. The river very beautiful, the water is very clear so my eyes could dive into the bottom of the river. Many fish is swam there and I could seen many color of the rocks at the base. It's feel like you are seeing an aquarium from the top. So I took a drink from it using my two hands.
     The wind was blew very slowly into my face and it make me very sleepy and I decide to take a rest before I continue my journey. One minutes I'd stand my ears is catch a girl sound and I think she was cry so my eyes is look surround me to search where are those sound came from.
     I found a beautiful girl the next I look in front of my eyes, she's wearing a long dress with a crown above her head, I was shocked and asking to my self "where am I and what age is now?". but even so I'd trry to gather all my courage and asking why she's cry at the place like a no where place.

"I'm sorry girl, why you cried?
Is there anything bother you or maybe you lost?"


She is starred on me and wondering why I am at the same place with her. then she asked a question for me.

"who are you?
why are you here? this is my dream. I didn't know you before"


Without answering any her question, I'm also wondering why that she said this is her dream, but in a minutes I thought maybe this girl can help me out from this place.

"I am so sorry girl, I'm also didn't know where I am now, the last time I'd remember is I am slept at Savana and when I was I awake I already came to this place,
please tell me where I am now?"


The girl stopped her cry and smiling at me, she is get up from the place she sat then she hold my arm.

"Actually you're in my dream now, in a real life I was a girl which been match by my parent and force me to married that guy.
so I'd pray and pray to God so I can get out from this situation and I want to find my own true love even through a dream.
and I was thinking this is the answer"


She was smile at me and grab my arm tightly then she hug me.. and said

"Please, if this the God answer for me kept this longer than I thought and please kept this dream so I'll know you much much better than this and I'll grow my feel to you. even I know this is not love, but the truth is now you were here for me"


I still couldn't speak a word because I don't know what to say or to answer her question, then I closed my eyes and speak slowly to her.

"really I don't know what is happen to me, but if this really happen to me tell me this is not a dream and I'll forever be with you to loving you.
I am now lost in the place of no where and I didn't care as long as you are beside me because in the real world."


Then I closed my eyes sharing a hug with her, and nothing more positively warm than this, I felt love and deeply lost of something that I have been searching for.

     Soon I realized when my eyes are open and I couldn't see anything in front of me accept a wedding party with all the crowd. I'm trying to enter the crowd and asked who's marriage is this, but no one seem looked me or even they didn't notice that someone, that's me are exist as a real person.
     I felt a deep hurt for loosing some moment when I thought I found my love, then soon I know everybody is not able to see me, I ran to find out the bride.
I seen...... my self sitting at the wedding chair with the bride as I know as "her" at the last moment. even I know that is my self but I can't feel anything except a deep hurt and all my pain flowing from my heart to my brain.

"Whats happen to me? am I dead?"


then I'd try to close my eyes again expecting everything will be different, and it's true when I opened my eyes I seen a grave yard where there's my name crafted on the stone. then I ran again to search someone who I know.... but I found a silent where every bird and every three is sang about a 'true love".
      I know it was a calming condition so I'm lying down and try to close my eyes, even I knew I was cry that time. when I opened my eyes I found out that I'm already come back to the place at the first I closed my eyes. an open savana at night where the full moon is shine very  bright.
     Then I get up from my sleep try to back to where I belong. but before that I was falling down hit a stone in front of me, and I was shocked when I saw the stone. I found a picture, a picture of the same girl I met at my dream and there's a note below the picture,

To the love that I'd searching in this world : 

I have been waited for you this long, in my entire life I couldn't see something that is really true like the way I'm feeling right now. lying here alone without some one who will carry me when I was hurt even my heart is not feel any pain anymore.

I really miss you remembering the time we have been together for 10 minutes beside the river of hope where nobody could be understand. there's no love feeling inside, it's only the matter of trust and a comfortable that you gave me that time. a believe where you are the only one for me who can bring me out from sorrow even in the real world we're doesn't existed.

I never love you with this condition I got of my life. if I were alive and I'll tell you that true love not to be mean a love, true love its mean a soul with there's a path we're through it together and holding hand with trust and sincerity.

True love based on some condition which built by a sorrow of loving and together we're gathering a courage to make it as a dream come true.

If you seen me married after we met, although I was married with the other side of you which gave me more true love of sincerity not by love in passion. and I'm really sorry for that cause.

For the second you met your self in a graveyard also lying dead without nobody there, its mean a true love even nobodies there to listen a true love will be existed even it expressed or never expressed at all.

that was about a feeling which shown to you about this life is all about. even right now I'm lying down as a princess to my self. but never be a slave for my self.

Thank you love! for everything you ever been said to me, for forever time you never thought I'm always be with you inside of your deepest heart. not to remember but for you to learn a sincerity of loving.

your princess,

girls at the river