Between Stupidity and Intelligence

"I hate doctors!"

"I hate Nutritionists!"

"I hate women that prohibits smoking boyfriends!"

This life and this certainly is an option that should choose as a cigarette retail merchant at a crossroads, Am I wrong if my life turns out to be located on the selling of ignorance. Am I not aware of? I am certainly very aware that smoke inhalation is death, but on the other hand this is my life, too. I don't beg the perfection, God created perfection in my body, I used to sell fried snacks until their mothers forbade their children to buy fried snacks foods for fear that I used vegetable oil is used oil, but it is not. Am I not be upset?.

I never blame God even because of that I'm very thankful why God created the tobacco, even though cigarettes themselves are created by humans with the intelligence to create a folly, then why do they forbid it? I believe the opposition among men or distinction whether it will lead to progress though because all competing to win or progress by creating a greater difference which is wars.

Do I smoke? was not! until finally I heard a quote that "if you want to win the war then get to know the battle field", That quote should be applied very well in my world, I am required to suck it folly to sell stupidity, and if I'm being stupid right now with my present condition still spinning in a circle of ignorance or indeed it is a reality that whoever we are if we do not know our self, what will we become, then by this reason I'm questioning who I am?.

"Lord, I ask forgiveness for having a lot of mistakes in this world, including the selling of this ignorance and of course I have to be stupid about it.

God, My mother was always saying to me to hang my dreams to the skies, but God forgive me for not listening to the words of my mother, I was too scared to put my dreams to the skies because my body is short and certainly I can't reach the sky. To climb the stairs I don't have any strength enough to climb the stairs with my physical condition. My friend said that we could go up into the sky without using a ladder, we can easily get on a plane but God, I don't have money for plane fare, for a bus ride I had to hitch a ride by selling so lost hope   to put my dreams above the sky.

God, if I may ask, I don't want as much as like other people ask. I know I hate doctors who forbid people to smoke, but the Lord this is my living now and actually I didn't hate the doctor as much as the cigarette wholesaler or wholesales traders in the markets. I'm just a cigarette retail whom are very grateful if one day there are who buy only a few sticks of cigarettes only.

A cent profit from cigarettes has given me the benefit, although it must come from the smoke and some diseases that must be caused by ignorance. I had saved for a month, yesterday I counted and totaled just three dollars and will pay my school who used it for a month I have to pay twenty thousand dollars, but God I'm so grateful to be stupid and to sell stupidity, rather a little stupidity. There are some who say that the beginning of something big is from the smallest, I was actually afraid of God, I'm afraid would be super super stupid and foolish days of selling it later.

In conscience I always enclosed by a dilemma when I'm 14 years like this day many friends on my age who also bought folly from me, actually I don't want to sell but it was also was my eating from day to day, although often I have to relate to the principal because find me for sold cigarettes on the street. What I am now? I'd pick up anything with a foolishness is rooted in the conscience.

God, at least let me sell a few sticks in the park just now where I sell, I sell the a cigarette this morning on a man who looks like he was waiting for her lover, but then when his lover came, they instead fighting about a cigarette and eventually they broke up, then the boy is come and blame me, he mad at me and yell at me with much word that actually at my age I'm not allowed to know. Forgive me Lord, I know it's my fault, forgive me Lord and unite them again.

Two days ago I sold three cigarettes to a pedicab driver, then the next day he blames me because his wife was angry because the daily budget had bought for cigarettes. I also got mad again, and certainly it was my fault God. Apparently I've sinned a lot, but I have to be stupid with this justification. I want to live smart by not being stupid. "

- Me 15 years ago -

"God I've become whom that I very hated, I'm very concerned with health around me and then working hard to fight ignorance as I've done, but yesterday I was playing in the Garden to get some fresh air I saw a little boy who selling cigarettes and It reminded me of a few years ago.

God I've become a doctor because of the ignorance that I sell and now I have to oppose ignorance, if I be a hypocrite or I'm just acting like the people in my world that must survive even if I must be stupid or pretending to be stupid to get my intelligence .

God, I can't understand, when all the ease which I think is not at all difficult, it increasingly difficult to learn from some phase of life whether it be stupid or clever in the human version, I get proof for Your Mightiness, before I became a doctor I broke up with my girlfriend because I smoke until finally I quit smoking and quit buy a cigarette from my subscriptions seller. Then I got married before becoming a doctor which is when I'm completing my studies, my wife-ballistic rampage for daily shopping budget, and he accused me that money is spent on buying cigarettes.

Am I old enough to know my self ? between the wasted smoke and what happen to the subscription seller that I usually bought cigarettes before I decided to quit? is he doesn't become a doctor someday or he will become a nutritionist like someone I used to hate as cigarettes retailer, is he will have the same experience with me?

God I'm confused though I do not want to be confused , I was thinking even if I don't want to be think every day. "

-Me a doctor - now -