Monday, February 14, 2011

died after valentine

“Come with me when the rain is over, so you will know the summer will be come and crowd like a post box”. Those words will be filled as my buried body downstream of the time when you start to go someplace I’d never knew before.

I already prepared a bullet for my gun when I’m stop playing my gun to kill my self at the top of the mountain we climbed. But I knew there was you watching me as a suffer valentine waited for my dead bodies started one huge step to come over you and I didn’t do it and I loved to suspend it as my red light to go further to my limitation.

Give me a reason!

So now give me a reason to believe that’s all wrong and it means why you lies while you talk you have found me in a junkyard. I wouldn’t die once more not only my loneliness from your side, they didn’t know you sing it to me. I ignored it!

I remember light are cloudy and the light over me when you finally found me. Give me reason to the thunder which built a new divide for gave a limit for hoping and dreaming. I already get what I deserve like a blowing whistle for your mouth when you sang at my valentine.

Don’t let me fall!

I got denial as my self because none of reason you gave is killed my heart and buried my bodies into deep even worse you killed my soul as a horse who ran for you. Please don’t let me fall underneath the moon and let me dive into you as someone I adored and take a little time underneath the sun, hold down the standing ultimatum that I was a human being. Its little to high for me to wait but don’t let me fall.

Just tell to me what should I do!? I’m still floating with the black cloud. I don’t want to trust you no more a loved person and I don’t want to touch by a limited heart or a lies from your sealed lips. Blame me for your life and take my black box away to surrender my heart string. Tell me once again about lies that you painted as a guilty feeling of yours. And I’m killed in action as living in a combat zone where lies is my pain.

It just reality in a fantasy and live in a cross border of redemption. We lived and working and eat as unhappy person as loved or not loving anybody. We talked spectrum of foolish in the fantasy life but the fact are being sealed. I don’t need your concern or explanation; I’m not a part of your destruction. A very sweet destruction like a corrupted mind of nationalism.

I don’t have any equal as an immortal feeling, suppressed by freedom or your present. This pain is just a will which can’t be erased even you scream out loud. We always cried in our shoulder this year and being a victim of who I am or all alone.

Don’t turn away and crossed my way. My feeling was died yesterday, my pain and my trust already surrender when you point a gun on me. It never be a settle thing after you tread so hard on me. I even couldn’t opened my eyes to realize that I’m still awake. If this one still my fantasy I’ll paint it as a tattoo on my back and wishing you never there as my mate but the truth has been answered by it self, I already lied that I am not what you’re and I’m self. Just the dark design which painted on a black wall when the night fall. Ironic!

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