Today is November the 1st, where everybody start to sing November rain by a band in 90's called Gun n Roses, a song which said about rain that fall on November and related to broken heart, heartache and many blue days it might be sorrow caused by our beloved is left us, being cheated, lie which then connected to love and loving thing from a man or from woman.
When everybody wrote on the date they called a diary which they explained things that we met at the whole day and finally ended up in a notes. Well I wouldn't called this as diary but thing that are just opinion of my passion in write not about my self or somebody else but this is art words which came from heart expression or the way how this hand moves. I'm not a writter or an artist which expressed their heart or their passion on a notes or words but this one is eyes of a finger, he dance like they way people dance in a party. Sometimes he doesn't know what he dance for or what the final of this notes but surely this is the bad dance I ever met on November the 1st when the rain is finally become of my friend everyday.
Today is a half moon above the sky and the rain was stopped since few hours ago, I can see the city light from my view even not good as New york city or any major city but from my view I can see freedom of thought where no one else would complain even you told me about how bad is this country, politics, scandals, and the life it self. Surely the air was clean tonight after the rain was stopped and the breeze start to blew in front of my face and that time what I will ask to my self is who I am now, who standing in between the past and future just knowing I'm just this minutes where my shoes are wet after the rain and my clothes are dirty because of the climb. And yes now I'm on the top of the hill, enjoying coffee which served my a man which I didn't know without paying any money like I used to in a coffee shop.
I'd drink coffee more than three cup today and it mean more than 200 ml which I used to take to prevent from coffee addict and it also not good for our health, and now I can feel cold under the communication provider tower seeing what I should see and feel what I should feel. ( as a metaphore on in a real life)
Exhausted, like normal people do when they walking without end and no place to come home. What is home? home is where you're ended, where someone you loved is serve tea after dinner and someone who kiss your lips when you start to sleep (over reacting of course but those are a man dreams in their life commonly). Childrens are laughing and watching television while you're sit back over the couch with your wife seeing them as the greatest achievement of your life (and once again that people dreams in commonly).
Who don't need to understand? may be the answer is none, every body wants to be priority, everybody need a respect or appreciation and perhaps value or regards for things that we do. When you placed as an employee on a company you need, they are giving you regards as a salary for your works. Some people are complain with the numbers and some people get arrogant because the number, the numbers also become a major thing in our achievement and sometimes also it defined you and your price. This is true life and the fact are telling me that, when you got power then you're able to buy anything you needs and (sometimes) it including loves and happiness. You don't need to agree with this opinion, everybody thinks different as they are thought about what is love and hapiness even how we describe our life, there are not the same.
So when the rain is started? is it only on November where the rain season is come regulary every years or it comes when the cloud are comes and covered the day, the thunders are sounding everywhere?
It is a God will even we can manipulate the rain to comes with the earlier technology but it is absolute of God will.
What will you complain if you're asking to your self while you're reflected on the mirror? will you asking about your happiness? which is according to you a happiness is come from love or someone we love or even money and how much money that you can earn? what will you say?. Are you saying that you are the most stupid guy who doesn't have enough courage to say that you love her and just sit while your eyes can't turn to her or are you saying that you are not smart enough to make some more money or make you boss proud of you?.
I can see a light which I should mention that was a star above the sky, I didn't see any other stars so I said to my self that was the brightest star between the other star or maybe that was a planet, venus or mars or I don't know, I'm not the expert on this so I will not saying that was a smartest star and the powerful star which can be shown while the others was hiding behind the cloud. So what makes different of a man?
Then I remembered my mother, and what she always telling me. "Be a man wich full of courage, always give the best for your self and pray as what you believed". She also told me that someday I will become a father from my children and someone will love me till the my age was closed, she told me those words while she cried because my father was left her. That time was a great motivation for me to stepping forward and being responsible of things that I've done and specialized responsible for my family. That was a big matter where a man need a courage and also fear of the boundaries and things that printed on my brain and do the next step.
I think the rain is start to fall even I still can see a star and the half moon from my distance.
I would dance in the rain and I won't cry just to pretend that I'm the happiest person in the world while the rain sound is make a fake on it. Let it be rain and let it be my dance over and over again even sometimes I need a value from my dance, but I don't know where I should ask so let it be the rain who flow to the river and down to the sea where hope and dream is still available for all of us, it's free anyway. so let dance!
The Jazz was resound over my ears from my mobile phone, swing and swing like the breeze. I don't know who's singing or what is the tittled, what I care this time is my coffee is getting cold while jazz are running through meanwhile I am asking to my self, where I was standing now and what I am standing for sure.
And the rain was fall.... over the November, this is how the start goes.
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